A Bad Day Fishing…

…turned into a good day for seeing Jesus.

John 21:1-19

21After these things Jesus showed himself again to the disciples by the Sea of Tiberias; and he showed himself in this way. ²Gathered there together were Simon Peter, Thomas called the Twin, Nathanael of Cana in Galilee, the sons of Zebedee, and two others of his disciples. ³Simon Peter said to them, “I am going fishing.” They said to him, “We will go with you.” They went out and got into the boat, but that night they caught nothing. ⁴Just after daybreak, Jesus stood on the beach; but the disciples did not know that it was Jesus. ⁵Jesus said to them, “Children, you have no fish, have you?” They answered him, “No.” ⁶He said to them, “Cast the net to the right side of the boat, and you will find some.” So they cast it, and now they were not able to haul it in because there were so many fish. ⁷That disciple whom Jesus loved said to Peter, “It is the Lord!” When Simon Peter heard that it was the Lord, he put on some clothes, for he was naked, and jumped into the sea. ⁸But the other disciples came in the boat, dragging the net full of fish, for they were not far from the land, only about a hundred yards off. ⁹When they had gone ashore, they saw a charcoal fire there, with fish on it, and bread. ¹⁰Jesus said to them, “Bring some of the fish that you have just caught.” ¹¹So Simon Peter went aboard and hauled the net ashore, full of large fish, a hundred fifty-three of them; and though there were so many, the net was not torn. ¹²Jesus said to them, “Come and have breakfast.” Now none of the disciples dared to ask him, “Who are you?” because they knew it was the Lord. ¹³Jesus came and took the bread and gave it to them, and did the same with the fish. ¹⁴This was now the third time that Jesus appeared to the disciples after he was raised from the dead.

¹⁵When they had finished breakfast, Jesus said to Simon Peter, “Simon son of John, do you love me more than these?” He said to him, “Yes, Lord; you know that I love you.” Jesus said to him, “Feed my lambs.” ¹⁶A second time he said to him, “Simon son of John, do you love me?” He said to him, “Yes, Lord; you know that I love you.” Jesus said to him, “Tend my sheep.” ¹⁷He said to him the third time, “Simon son of John, do you love me?” Peter felt hurt because he said to him the third time, “Do you love me?” And he said to him, “Lord, you know everything; you know that I love you.” Jesus said to him, “Feed my sheep. ¹⁸Very truly, I tell you, when you were younger, you used to fasten your own belt and to go wherever you wished. But when you grow old, you will stretch out your hands, and someone else will fasten a belt around you and take you where you do not wish to go.” ¹⁹(He said this to indicate the kind of death by which he would glorify God.) After this he said to him, “Follow me.”

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Dear friends, grace to you and peace from our loving God through Christ, who feeds us and in turn, sends us to feed others.  Amen.

A colleague reminded me this week that in these stories we hear the first few Sundays after Easter, we must remember that the disciples are trying to process horrible trauma.

When we recognize this, we can better understand the choices they make and the things they say.  And so in today’s story, Peter and this particular group of disciples are exhibiting a very common response to trauma: they return to what is familiar.

They go fishing.

Of course, their “fishing” is not the recreational kind.  Even though Jesus has already told them “as the Father has sent me, so I send you” they are still trying to figure out what they’re going to eat, how they’re going to support themselves.

That’s another mark of trauma processing, finding something to keep you busy so you can avoid dealing directly with the trauma.

And then they spend the whole night fishing, and catch nothing.

Can you imagine what was going through their heads at that point?

They must have felt utterly, completely defeated.  Worthless.

And then some landlubber shows up and gives them unsolicited advice from the shore.  Yeah, that’s what we need.  Some guy who doesn’t fish, to tell us how to fish.

But I imagine they were tired enough at that point to just let the net down.

And THEN it became clear.  The disciple Jesus loved, whom we generally understand to be John, recognized that only Jesus had given them this advice before, with the same results.

More fish than they could believe.  Almost more than they could haul in – but they managed.  Apparently they even counted them.

Peter’s impulsiveness drives him to first put his robe back on, THEN jump in the water and swim to shore.  A bit odd, but there you go.

But what must he have thought, standing there on the beach, dripping wet and looking into the eyes of his Lord whom he denied three times?

Was he regretting that impulsiveness?  Because now, the shame of what he had done was likely taking center stage in his mind.

Thankfully, he was able to get busy hauling the net onshore from the boat.  And then Jesus says to them all, “come and have breakfast.”

Not a word about any of the things that have happened in the last few days.  Nothing about anyone’s denials.  Just words of welcome and hospitality.

It’s a scene with so many reminders: of the Last Supper, of the multiplying the fishes and loaves, and of Jesus washing their feet.

And ultimately it’s a scene of boundless and radical grace.  Of Christ meeting us in our places of trauma, our places of shame, our places of thinking we are falling short somehow – and him showing us nothing but generous love.

I think that is the real meaning of the number of fish.  Some sources tie that number to other meanings, but even 153 minnows is a LOT of fish!  Let’s say those were a species like widemouth bass, average size about 5 pounds.  Again – a LOT of fish.

God’s love for us is over-the-top generous, like this catch of fish.  More than is typical, reasonable, or expected.  And it’s given even when we might feel we don’t deserve it.

Because God does not operate in a transactional economy.  God doesn’t request payment in order to dispense God’s love.

In the story, Jesus knows the disciples are hungry, and no matter what he might have planned to say to them, their immediate need is to eat.  Jesus is a practical person; he knows that trying to have serious conversation on an empty stomach is a very bad idea!  But he also knows that the shepherd meets the needs of his flock before he meets his own needs.  Again, not a transactional economic model.

If anything, God’s economic model is backwards.  Upside down.  Not based on anything that makes sense in our modern world.

Jesus asks Peter three times if he loves him.  Traditionally, this is seen as Peter being absolved of his three denials.  But I wonder if what Jesus is doing is making sure that Peter understands, he is being entrusted with Jesus’ most valuable gift – his love.  For Jesus doesn’t follow Peter’s answers with anything like “well then why did you betray me?”

Rather, he implores Peter, “feed my sheep.”

In other words: pay it forward.

I don’t need retribution, says Jesus.  I desire reconciliation, and the best gift you could ever give me is to take all that I’ve given you and pay it forward.  To feed my sheep.  To guide them and empower them, the same as I have done for you.

You might call this a “crabgrass” economic model.

I’ve been pulling a lot of crabgrass out of my front garden recently, and the ability of that stuff to spread underground is staggering.

If God’s model of being in the world were one that only gave out love if we earned it, it would never spread.  We’d hoard it for ourselves.

But in the crabgrass economic model, God loves us WITHOUT anything on our part, and only asks that we pay it forward.  Spread it around.  Like crabgrass.

Think about the times when the church has had to be underground, LITERALLY like crabgrass.  It continued to spread!

It’s an economic model that doesn’t rely on being the center of attention, but rather finding the places where God’s love is needed, and being spreaders and givers of that love.

Jesus is honest with Peter about this model.  He warns him that it likely won’t end well.  And we see this today, don’t we?  The forces of evil continue to work against the forces of good.  Greed and pride and envy and all the rest – we see these on full display, leaving destruction in their wake, every day.

And yet, the love of God has continued to spread around the world.

Jesus comes to the beach, not to call back a straying disciple or to twist the knife about the threefold denial. He’s here to renew Peter’s calling. Because new challenges lie ahead. Vulnerable sheep can’t be helped by someone incapable of love.

God in Jesus comes to us now, today, to do the same.  To call us to renewal and love and new life in the resurrected Christ.  Not to layer more busy work onto our shoulders, but rather to invite us to seek new life in the same places – and in new ones.

To let down our nets on the other side of the boat, so that we might be reminded just how much God loves us.  And then, to get out of the boat.

Because new life awaits, and that love – like 153 fish – HAS to be shared.

Amen.